Ukraine War Day #303: Zelensky’s New Toys

Dear Readers:

Just a quickie today, but look for something “meatier” over the weekend.

Anyhow, I saw this concise summary, on Rybar, of all the goodies that were promised to Zelensky during his recent speech in the American Congress, here it is, starting with One Patriot Battery, Ten Mortars, etc. and down to the Partridge in the Pear Tree. They say that partridges make good artillery spotters.

In theory, it doesn’t look like that much. But personally, I am more worried about what they are not telling us. For example, I have been reading here and there that NATO has restarted (not sure where, probably in Czechia) some Soviet-era factories to start pumping out the kind of Soviet-era ammunition that Ukrainians can actually use themselves, without having to import Western instructors.

But as for the official stuff, that’s listed above, and I eschew commentary on the hardware issues, since other bloggers do that so much better.

Other Russophile bloggers have also taken care of all the possible jokes about Zelensky’s trip, how he offered his filthy grizzled cheek to Nancy Pelosi, but she chose to kiss his filthy germy paws instead. Russophiles missed a serious opportunity here: They should have hired a professional joke writer, an insult comedian, to infiltrate the audience and heckle Zelensky at every turn of phrase. For example, Zelensky: “We welcome this expanding aid…” Insult Comic: Reminds me of your expanding waistline, Voldemar… speaking of which, what’s with the man-bra and that puke-green sweatshirt?”

Or how the Demented Emperor got confused and called him “Bilensky”, and then praised the “Uranian people”, those are the warlike yet democratic race who dwell on the planet Uranus.

Or how Tucker Carlson came up with one of the best lines about Zelensky looking like a strip-club bouncer who walzed into the U.S. Congress to extort money.

But the best joke of all, I saw on a random youtube channel, in response to the question, “Why couldn’t he put on a suit and tie, just to show some respect?” the commenter retorted: “Why bother? Do you bother to put on a suit and tie when you’re just going out to the ATM?”

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21 Responses to Ukraine War Day #303: Zelensky’s New Toys

  1. Liborio Guaso says:

    Everything is nothing more than selling the illusion of a Ukrainian democratic Nazism, for which they fight as a weapon of internal social control, of course without running any risk and regardless of the thousands or millions of deaths or the destruction of a civilized nation.
    We have seen that many times in this 21st century that begins the Third Millennium of Western Civilization, which has become the worst tragedy in the history of humanity.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. lou strong says:

    The best I read ( here’s the link but I don’t have time to watch and check it out )
    is that Zelensky in the Congress speech made this freudian lapsus :“I hope that Congress will approve financial assistance for our CRIMES…”


    • yalensis says:

      Yup, that’s what the translator said. Finally, an honest translator!
      Check out the gal doing the sign language as well, she seems overly engaged.
      I wish I knew sign language, did she sign “our crime” ?


      • Sacha says:

        We don’t hear the words of the clown. Would have been hilarious that he used the word crimes…


        • yalensis says:

          Zelensky’s native language is Russian, but after Maidan he started speaking publicly in Ukrainian. He had to take lessons and learn the language as an adult, so it’s still a struggle for him, that’s what people say. He’s okay if he has a written script or cue cards in front of him, but he struggles if he has to extemporize.
          I am assuming he delivered to speech to Congress in Ukrainian, with the interpreter doing simultaneously translation into English.
          I don’t know Ukrainian that well, so I had to google the word for “crime”, it’s злочинність (zlo-chynnist), there are probably other synonyms as well. Nothing at all like the word for “country” which is країна (krayina).

          Oh wait, I just had a theory, if Zel uttered “krayina”, that sort of sounds like “crime”, so maybe the translator just got mixed up and started to say “krayina” as well. Simultaneous translation can be very confusing. I tried it once, summer job, long story, anyhow it’s hard to quickly switch your brain back and forth between two languages, so sometimes you just slip up and say the same word as the other person just did. And then everybody laughs.


  3. David White says:

    Kamala and Nancy were absolutely fawning over their little pet president


  4. the pair says:

    avigdor lieberman was a fat bouncer from moldova and now he’s in charge of israel’s economy.

    i guess in that region of the world no one lets you carry money around unless you’re a 300 pound slob with a temper.

    as for zel’s attire, it was a feature and not a bug. if he showed up to the heart of a decaying empire wearing a houndstooth prada suit with italian loafers the people whose tax dollars went to that outfit instead of schools or filling potholes might be a bit resentful. maybe he took a little inspiration from castro’s fatigues but he’s just an actor and his role is “plucky resistance ‘fighter'” bravely killing orcs and their kids whereas castro was actually knee deep in the sh_t when his particular revolution started.

    the johnson guy makes an interesting comparison to diem

    but i can’t help but think of that infamous picture of rumsfeld shaking saddam’s hand. the US have never had – or wanted – “friends”. it’s a psychopathic, narcissistic empire and as such only “likes” others to the extent they’re temporarily useful.


    • yalensis says:

      Well, there is something in between Prada and khakis. Zel could have dressed business casual, for example. Maybe a sport jacket. A reasonably nice shirt with a collar, but no tie. There is a word for that in Russian: “bez galstuka” (without tie).


  5. WJ says:

    A heckler would end up in the DC gulag without trial for years.


  6. Daniel Rich says:

    Per Z’s humble request[s]:

    1) What happened to the ‘original’ 404 Army?
    2) Why need new toys that are larger than the combined armed forces of either France, Britain or Germany?
    3) Why sell your rip off as ‘an investment opportunity?’

    Go back to play the piano, and turn ‘Quatre Main’ into ‘Deux Bites’ once more. You’re good at it.


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