Ukraine War Day #303: Zelensky’s New Toys

Dear Readers:

Just a quickie today, but look for something “meatier” over the weekend.

Anyhow, I saw this concise summary, on Rybar, of all the goodies that were promised to Zelensky during his recent speech in the American Congress, here it is, starting with One Patriot Battery, Ten Mortars, etc. and down to the Partridge in the Pear Tree. They say that partridges make good artillery spotters.

In theory, it doesn’t look like that much. But personally, I am more worried about what they are not telling us. For example, I have been reading here and there that NATO has restarted (not sure where, probably in Czechia) some Soviet-era factories to start pumping out the kind of Soviet-era ammunition that Ukrainians can actually use themselves, without having to import Western instructors.

But as for the official stuff, that’s listed above, and I eschew commentary on the hardware issues, since other bloggers do that so much better.

Other Russophile bloggers have also taken care of all the possible jokes about Zelensky’s trip, how he offered his filthy grizzled cheek to Nancy Pelosi, but she chose to kiss his filthy germy paws instead. Russophiles missed a serious opportunity here: They should have hired a professional joke writer, an insult comedian, to infiltrate the audience and heckle Zelensky at every turn of phrase. For example, Zelensky: “We welcome this expanding aid…” Insult Comic: Reminds me of your expanding waistline, Voldemar… speaking of which, what’s with the man-bra and that puke-green sweatshirt?”

Or how the Demented Emperor got confused and called him “Bilensky”, and then praised the “Uranian people”, those are the warlike yet democratic race who dwell on the planet Uranus.

Or how Tucker Carlson came up with one of the best lines about Zelensky looking like a strip-club bouncer who walzed into the U.S. Congress to extort money.

But the best joke of all, I saw on a random youtube channel, in response to the question, “Why couldn’t he put on a suit and tie, just to show some respect?” the commenter retorted: “Why bother? Do you bother to put on a suit and tie when you’re just going out to the ATM?”