Mongol Hygiene, is it all it’s cracked up to be? – Part I

Dear Readers:

Guess what?  July is Russian History Month here at the Avalanche – yay!  I have planned out a whole series of posts, starting with this one, on Tatar-Mongol hygiene practices, then seamlessly segueing into a review of the Russian TV soap opera Godunov Season 2.  Which segues seamlessly, in part, because Boris Godunov was said to be part Tatar, believe it or not.  Russia’s second least popular Tsar was allegedly descended from a certain Tatar Prince Chet, whose Horde settled in Kostroma in the 14th century.

Tatar Prince Chet … might have looked something like this…

Anyhow, this series of posts will cover the period of Russian history, starting with the clean and dainty Horde, morphing along through the dusty and dirty Time of Troubles, and then concluding (if my timing is correct) with a big climactic finish on July 22.  The day of the founding of the Romanov dynasty!  Please note that, as we march along, I reserve my editorial right to break up the fun, as needed, with Breaking News stories.  Like, if WWIII started, that would be an example.

So, let us start with the Tatar-Mongol Horde.  And, by the way, I always thought it would be very cool to be called a “horde” as opposed to, say, a tribe.  Students of Russian history know that Russians aka Slavs had a close and personal relationship with Tatars.  The two peoples fought wars, inter-married, divorced, bickered, over the centuries.  Western Liberals have a history of criticizing Russia on this issue.  Being “half Mongolian” has always been an insult and imprecation that they hurl at Russia.  As if the Mongols were bad people and brought nothing but misery.

Western Liberals allow themselves to be very racist on this issue.  Russophobia is the only form of racism that they tolerate; and the whole Mongol issue is one of the pillars of that racism.  I once, with my own ears, heard one American Liberal explain to another, how “Russian faces are not quite right” because of the Mongol genes, like the eyes are too high, or maybe the noses aren’t quite pointy enough; and also, the Mongol influence explains why Russians are allergic to Western Democracy.  Because all they learned how to do, under the Mongol yoke, was bow and scrape to their Khan.  As opposed to the fair-skinned English, who do a proper curtsey to their monarch.

Of all the members of the Horde, this girl was the ugly duckling…

Anyhow, without further polemic, let us dive into this very interesting story written by Orynganym Tanatarova, author of five sci-fi/fantasy books and numerous articles on Russian history.

When two different peoples, she writes (I assume it’s a she) live for a very long time together as neighbors, then the process of cultural interaction is inevitable.  People borrow from each other:  words, everyday domestic objects, crafts, cooking recipes, and much else.  Certain customs and even everyday habits may also be borrowed, if they turn out to be useful.  This also relates to the field of personal hygiene.  Please keep on reading, and we shall learn how the Tatars taught Russians better grooming practices.  Making them the high-maintenance folk they are today, squatty noses and all…

[to be continued]

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