Yats Urges Shock Troops To Join NATO

Today, a bit of humor, to lighten the mood.  Here is a piece from RusVesna, which I translate in full:

TRANSLATION

Headline: 

Yatsenuk reminded the pundit of Stalin, but without the sense of humor

The words of Ukrainian Prime Minister Arseny Yatsenuk, who declared that Ukraine will become the 29th member of NATO, shows his true attitude towards his own people, according to Ukrainian political pundit Konstantin Bondarenko.

Bondarenko [quoted from his Facebook page]:

There is this “apocryphal” story.  In February of 1935, giving a speech at the Second All -Union Conference of Kolkhoznik-Shock-Troopers [yalensis:  agricultural workers who had won prizes for productivity] Stalin uttered the phrase:  “The revolution of the slave class shook the foundations of the Roman Empire.” (…) and continued on about changes to the social class structure, the dialectic, historical materialism, and the like.

After this speech, a certain well-known Soviet Historian of Antiquity, a certain Vladimir, approached Stalin, and asked him, when exactly did this “slave revolution” occur, because he needed to make sure to add these “new facts” to his own historical monographs.  To which, Stalin allegedly replied:  “Oh, I didn’t think you would take my words seriously!  After all, I was speaking to kolkhoznik-shock troopers.”

“It seems,” Bondarenko concluded, “that when Yatsenuk announced that Ukraine would become the 29th member of NATO, he was just speaking to the kolzhoznik-shock troopers.”

[yalensis:  sorry, the joke is funnier in the original Russian]

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3 Responses to Yats Urges Shock Troops To Join NATO

  1. Cortes says:

    At a concert in Glasgow the über “do gooder ” Bono started clapping slowly and solemnly declared “every time I clap me hands a child in Africa dies”. The pretentious arsehole was a bit taken aback by the shout from a wit in the audience: “Well stop fuckin’ clappin’ then” and the cheers it received.

    Like

    • yalensis says:

      Hee hee, good comeback!

      Alt-retort:
      “Well, everytime I clap MY hands, Tinkerbell lives! So, it’s a draw, then.”

      Like

      • yalensis says:

        P.S. – I was expecting my pal Spartacus to leap in with “But… but… Stalin must have been talking about Spartacus and HIS slave rebellion!” That’s kind of what I assumed. But then the joke wouldn’t be as funny.

        Like

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